My first time every posting. Advice ?

Im fifteen and just started rapping about a month ago. I wrote down only a couple of my raps. This was one of them wondering if i could get any advice...

Hey my dad keeps asking me why/that im so ready to die/but i been gettin so high/ that i cant give him the reson/slicing my wrists man the shit wont stop bleedin/trying to live the good life but hell is all that im seein/ and i know i aint doin what im supposed to be/ keep my middle fingers up there aint no hope for me/ trying to hang from the ceiling aint no rope for me/ tryin to OD there aint no dope for me/ like im addicted and they handin out coke for free/ make it past sixteen? well hopefully/ i wanna take a step back and just breathe/ but these thoughts of suicide just wont leave/ and i dont wanna keep going cuz loosin is too hard/ im ready to bail and jump out of a moving car/ maybe when im gone people will look back and see that i wrote this/ maybe theyll miss me? sike they wont even notice/ im fuckin hopeless/ and i know this/

i got a couple other ones that i am looking for advice on too

anything helps...

D-trips YES I think just a bit
U seem to have morbidly obscene thoughts of which U must rid
Yourself of
Think of sum funny ass shit like fake teeth and butt plugs
When hours- days- N - weeks all of a sudden turn into months
Then there you'll be
Maby alone! But free
Dont take that tone with me
Everybody gotta skill that can be honed - my homey
Its never that bad and its never that good
But its UNDERSTOOD!
It is what it is-We adapt we adjust
We rise from the dust- brush our shoulders off as such
A particular type of manner-
Walk off the damn field like we just hit a grand slammer[center]

rule number one 13 don't take advice from fish187 hes a blithering idiot