My second rap song

Going into my girlfriend's house getting attacked
I got smacked, whacked, and sacked and racked
I got chased out of the house fucking running fast
Runing fast going to leave it all in the fucking past
Does it look I'm bothered I do take crack and smack
I'll fight you to the death your face needs a hard crack
Punching you very hard until you have a bloody face
don't you think that I don't know that I'm a disgrace
I got caught sniffing and boffing Lynx aerosol can
Just because I listen to Eminem mean I'm Stan
Look at me I'm stabbing them and I'm slashing
Putting them on tables smashing and lashing
And inject this cute girl with the lethal injection
Don't blame me if couldn't deal with the rejection
Drag the girl across the carpet,she's getting friction
I'm on trial for the death of the girl the murder conviction
I know that I'm white trash yes I did spent my cash on hash
Slashing you fast and you will be asking me for forgiveness
My father left my mother for a woman who was in the business

Going into my girlfriend's house getting attacked
When I was little my mother found me with bleach
Every girl I date they are like a fucking bloody leach
And when I say no to them all i can hear is the screech

that sounded like a freestyle right off top of your head.put my effort into it. and take more time writing, even if you wrote a perfect rap in 20 minutes, take the time to go and look back at the song like 5 more times to see if you can make it more better or perfect.

and it sounded like you were killing a girl or something? you was not that clear,i mean rap songs have to have a topic,dont just rap about anything that sounds good. stay on topic and work hard.trust me, it will pay off in the future. also, try using bigger rhymes,don't use them simple words and shit.but keep up the good work.

Thank you going to take much more time now