On The Spot Freestyle

i have zero faith of the power in the fame,
but the power is against my name,
its not as fun as it goes,
so prepare to strike a show,
the pussy and then the pose,
the massacre then the clothes,
then the prada for the women,
im charlie sheen and im winning,
im rapping on these beats,
yo girl thinks im appealing,
just baught a new pair of cleats,
im running through these bases,
when im sliding for the home,
plate with my niggas,
thats not the price of position,
ya boy needs help with his sight of his vision,
ya niggas be bitchin about the way you been livin,
stop being a pussy and live for the missions,
dont get over your head,
your just a kid with the name of a definition.... (not finished but how was it?)

Well I'll give you that you have a good flow going into it. but it seems to have faltered as you went more into it. the bars became sloppier and you began to rhyme less. Then you came back with some what seemed to be filler they weren't any really standing out punchlines... The delivery was a little on the low side felt as though you weren't interested in it just putting things down because they were typical lines that went together well....

I like the message and the end of they whole thing was a really good way to finish it... though it's not finished.... recommend you tighten up the middle and work on some deeper lines to keep the energy other than that it was pretty average...

rtf please...

You didn't like that then read this, you won't got much to say cuz I don't like fits, so I'll leave you speechless, you think you're fat than eat-less, but I ain't self-conscious, you feelin sick you gettin nauseous, wouldn't last a second in a cockpit, you like music, love it when I drop it, including you is the girls, few days from now the whole world, fame comes in a swirl, you mentioned how he got bored, well that won't happen to me with the shit I've got stored, in my brain its to blame for the countless posts, scratch that's man call them roasts, cuz every rap showed a nigga up, like I give a fuck, more drink in my cup, I'm gettin thirsty, I talk to you to serve me, cause nigga in worthy, I ain't tryna to come out rude I'm sure that's what you assume I want you as a fan, now you know my plan, hope you understand, I'm doing what I can for a lil recognition, only thing I've been wishin, for don't want to be ignored, the shit I have In store for years to come, make some money? Like a ton but what's more important to me, recognized as legendar-y, a true G, one of the greats, a real MC